Beware the Moon Podcast

Literally. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! You guys are beautiful and wonderful and i hope your day is filled with bliss and your enemy's day is full of nuisance (hitting every red light, bad traffic, stubbing their pinky toe, etc.). Thus are the blessings of the moon, and you as well. If you're still reading, you are one of the chosen few. Only WE can stand up against tyranny, together. Only we can vanquish evil, once and for all. Only we can stop Jennifer Anniston. We ride at midnight

MERRY THANKSGIVING!! Can't wait to watch Gremlins in preparation for merry chrysler. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Let me hit you with a weird phrase: dont ever trust a heart you can't break. What you think about that? Lemme know

Lets talk about this... https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-news/melissa-barrera-fired-scream-vii-1235669458/

THE STORY SO FAR: I play as a novelist married to a boring photographer who bought this obviously haunted mansion for me (that I would totally love to have in real life). These people are clearly not normal because all they have are noodles and tuna in their cupboard, but not abnormal in a fun way because he has a greasy pony tail. Anyway, I explored the house, my husband's pipe was clogged, but he said he could unclog it himself (not what he said in the intro, but whatever). After swearing at everything in the house, I found that there are three rooms in this house that are locked (BOO!) so I went to get the keys from captain pisshead in town (the guy who sold us the house). Unfortunately, the key from captain pisshead only unlocks one of the three doors. The door it unlocks leads to the study of a macabre magician clearly obsessed with the occult. I accidentally pushed a brick through the fireplace (that's right) and in the opening, I found a room. So, like the detective I am, I use my new cat-knife to remove the mortar and get my ass in that room. It's like a little sanctuary, but probably for satan. There's a box that needs to be unclogged and it wants ME to help unclog it. I do, because we're here to get dead, and I release Slimer the ghost. Of course, I don't tell my husband, because I unclogged a ghost's pipe but not his--why would I admit to that? This game was gifted to me by the wonderful ETNWHVAC. Find him here: https://rumble.com/c/ETNWHVAC He does HVAC stuff, airplane simulator streams (like the legit ones) and 7 days to die (it would take me a lot less than 7 days to die, but who am i to judge?) Note: i get this one confused with phasmaphobia a lot, so be prepared for this to be called Phasma-razzma-tazz to cover up my and memory. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS!!! pbeavr, whenlogicdies, sacredsage, etnwhvac, and kenizifam Hope you guys are having the bestest day ever, moon-blessing upon you all *werewolves howl in the distance* If you're still reading this, then know that thanksgiving is a hoax created to trap woman in their backwoods hometowns with men wearing flannel who sweep them off their feet and convince them to leave their successful career in the city so they can get married and so that she can go missing 6 months later--another victim, another name to add to the stack. Stay vigilant ladies. And, remember fellas: you're not exempt from danger either.

who knows what we're doing? FIND KEGZ: https://rumble.com/c/OiKegz FIND SKITZO: https://rumble.com/user/Skitzzo33 find raiken: https://rumble.com/user/RaikenNight

I have no idea what this game is or is about, so this ought to be fun. It was gifted to me by the wonderful ETNWHVAC. Find him here: https://rumble.com/c/ETNWHVAC He does HVAC stuff, airplane simulator streams (like the legit ones) and 7 days to die (it would take me a lot less than 7 days to die, but who am i to judge?) Note: i get this one confused with phasmaphobia a lot, so be prepared for this to be called Phasma-razzma-tazz to cover up my nad memory. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS!!! pbeavr, whenlogicdies, sacredsage, etnwhvac, and kenizifam Hope you guys are having the bestest day ever, moon-blessing upon you all *werewolves howl in the distance* If you're still reading this, then you're now part of my cult. Sorrynotsorry. Next meeting is at dusk tomorrow, please bring snackos.

Was gunna do something else, but then i changed my mind. Also, brother received wishlist. Reaction went something like this: "I'm not buying you a zebra" "The f*ck is this list??" "I can't tell whats real and whats fake" (I told him it was all real, especially the whale penis cane) SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--KeniziFam, maga master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Made it this far in the description? I'm impressed. I will give you the moon blessing *blesses* *a thousand screams can be heard in the distance*

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauh SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. If you're still reading this, then please send an SOS to these coordinates: N 37° 21' 22.8348", W 77° 23' 28.0824" My kin will awaken--I mean... come find me.

It will f-u-ck your whole brain up in the best way. Just survive the 1st 30 mins--you won't be disappointed. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace, and Kenizifam--maga master. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Look at you, you beautiful bastard/bitch. I love that about you. I give you the blessing of the ancestors *pours dr pepper on your head and starts humming*

I've eaten so much cheese, i dont even know what to do with myself. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace, and Kenizifam--master of maga. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Wonderful. Tonight at midnight, we make the sacrifice. It will protect us from Jennifer Anniston. Bring knife.

Feel like i should start rattling off weird affirmations mid-stream if there's a lull. Something like, "YOU are a pink starburst" or "fluffy dogs love you". SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Good, have this not-a-pickup line: girl, you must be a termite--you make my wood nervous.

chicken nugget SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Excellent. The plan has been set in motion. Prepare for battle. We ride at dusk.

My niece said so. SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still looking at this long-ass drivel of word vomit? Beautiful. By "beautiful" I mean you. I hope you're having a lovely day and that all your bills get paid on time this month and that santa gives you a smooch for christmas. What? Yes. You heard me.

Is your mother worried? Would you like us to assign someone to worry your mother? SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace, and KeniziFam--master of many things. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? I like your attention to detail. Please join me at these coordinates: 44.590279, -104.715279 at exactly midnight tonight for a non-sacrificial summoning of a non-terrifying entity of unknown original. Bring a snack of your choice. Illumirati rise

Did y'all know that the voice actor for Falkor also voiced G'mork? Wild. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you need to watch Neverending Story. For the tiddy-laser sphinxes, if nothing else (personally, I watch for Artex, RIP big guy, and G'mork because I'm like that). SHOUT OUT TO MY SUBS: pbeavr, the mythical rodent of legend--whenlogicdies, a beautiful gem of a human being--SacredSage, digital master--and ETNWHVAC, rumble's favorite menace. I hope you are all having the bestest day. Still reading? Excellent. The plan has been set in motion. Prepare for battle. We ride at dusk.

WHO AMONG US IS RUSSIA'S GREATEST LOVE MACHINE??!?!?(it's me). Shoutout to my subs: whenlogic dies--a beautiful gem, pbeavr--the best rodent, SacredSage--digital master, ETNWHVAC--my favorite menace on rumble.

Here's the deal: my older brother wants a christmas wishlist from me. I wish for no things. SO, i had this fun idea to let me chat decide what to put on the list. Literally anything goes. The more unhinged, the better. I FORGOT THE FUCKN Y IN MERRY IM DEAD Anyway. Yeah, hit up the chat.

F*ck, marry, kill: Godzilla vs King Kong--give me your answer. If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble, and SacredSage--digital master. I wish you three, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. you're still here? Noice. Love you

HAPPY HOWLOWEEN!!!!!! We got Synthrax, JDADelete, Miss Ma'am, ETNWHVAC, Geyck and more in this one!!!!

Put candy out for the goblins. If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble, and SacredSage--digital master. I wish you both, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. HAPPY HALLOWEEN ILLUMIRATTI--keep your eyes out for Jennifer Anniston

If you see beavr, DONT TELL JENNIFER ANISTON. Find Radiant here: https://rumble.com/c/RadiantDawnGaming

Distressing news: Last night, Jennifer Aniston caught wind that beavr caught wind that she was the reason Matt Chandler Perry died (murder. She murdered him). While I was streaming, the beavr lodge was attacked by a thin blonde assailant with excellent skin and terrifyingly blue eyes. That said, pbeavr has had to move from being pbeavr to another, differenter account name--which I cannot disclose for fear that our old friend from Friends will find him. Luckily, he's managed to shake her for now, but I have no doubt she's hot on his tail. God speed beavr. If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble, and SacredSage--a digital master. I wish you both, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. If you're this far in the description, then you're part of the illumarati--the SSS--the resistance against Jennifer Aniston and her many war crimes. Take shelter. Trust no beautiful blondes. Beware.

You ever just accidentally carry around roach bait in your pocket? ...no? Just me? huh.... If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble, and SacredSage--master of digital arts. I wish you 3, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. Still reading? Excellent. Welcome to the SSS. Your new task is to find Jennifer Aniston and stop her before her killing spree goes any farther. For too long, her crimes have been overlooked, and now grown men are "drowning" in hot tubs because of her wrath. She must be stopped.

If you eat mac and cheese with a spoon, you have no right to call yourself an adult. I said what i said. If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble. I wish you both, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. Still reading? Wonderful! You're part of the secret society now. Big love for you. What movie scared you the most as a kid? Let me know in the chat/comments/sky

My favorite Halloween costume when I was a kid: tie between being Nala from Lion King and being the pink power ranger. What was yours? If you enjoy this, watch other things of mine. If you don't enjoy this, watch other things of mine anyway. It's good for your soul, I promise. Also like this thing, comment nice stuff, follow, live mas. SHOUTOUT TO MY SUBS!!! Pbeavr--the rodent, the myth, the madness--and whenlogicdies--the most valuable gem on rumble. I wish you both, specifically, the bestest of days. Everyone else can have a mediocre day... I guess. If you've read this far, that means you're part of the secret society now. I don't make the rules, I just relay them (last guy who accused me of making the rules in my own cult mysteriously disappeared). ANYWAY, that said: welcome to the cult!! I mean--secret society. Definitely two different things, I swear. Now that you've joined, you must follow, like and comment on this video--preferably telling me if you liked Chuck E Cheese as a child and what your favorite halloween costume was, but honestly, any comment works. Thanks and I hope your weekend is lovely.