"God gave man a brain and a penis. And only enough blood to run one at a time." - Robin Williams

1 year ago
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"God gave man a brain and a penis. And only enough blood to run one at a time." - Robin Williams What are some real-life examples of this?
Issac Newton die virgin, he went full brain
I bought a sex toy for $25 and proceeded to pay $30 for one day shipping.
My bf and i will be having a perfectly normal conversation, then I'll start changing for bed and he just short circuits. Loses his train of thought, completely forgets what he's talking about, and immediately comes to hold me. Every. Time. He's seen me naked for the last 10 years.....
My cousin’s (ex)husband sent dick pics to a “fifteen year old girl†. It wasn’t a fifteen year old girl, but he’s still divorced and on the sex offenders register now.Edit: typo.
Overthinking during foreplay and losing an erection.
That's why you should always have an extra flask of fresh blood with you. You never know when you need your brain.
Middle age men blowing up their entire lives for some young strange
I sent my bf nudes once and he ran his truck into a tree because he wouldn’t stop thinking about it lmfao
Arnold flocking those house keepers. What was he thinking throwing away his marriage for a little side action.
My first two marriages
Morning wood. Your wood is energetic but your brain is tired. Simple!
Girl behind the register started flirting with me. Bluescreened so hard i paid for my groceries but forgot to take them with me, didn't realise until hours later.
The fact that autoerotic asphyxiation is a thing and that multiple people have died from it
Like last week when I thought it would be not only convenient, but a good idea to go sleep with the Neihbor lady and it turned out she was an actual crazy person that I had to block and now lives on the other side of my living room wall...
“It was like the time I hired that Bangkok prostitute to do my taxes while I flocked my accountant." -- John McAfee
That captain who crashed a mega yacht showing off for some chick on the bridge.MILLIONS OF DOLLARS.
Me choosing between jerking off to porn and going to sleep.
You know how it's usually a good idea to eat before you go buy groceries? Well that's why I masturbate before going out in a bar.
Bill Clinton.
What the flock did i just do? Syndrome
Robin Williams cheating on his first wife with (I believe) his kids nanny
I’ve done a lot of stupid things thinking it would end with my dick in some pussy.
In my day me going back to my batshit crazy ex because the sex was incredible. Three different times. Somehow I finally found the testicular fortitude to break the cycle.Edited to say thanks for the awards!
Post nut clarity.
Every guy who talks to a girl, then immediately regrets everything he said after he jacks off.
I am on a dating platform, and everytime I get horny i only decide wether the girl looks beautiful or not. But when I am not horny I read her complete Bio.
Totally today. Had sex with wife. Then went and bought dinner. Then said to my wife what’s for dinner. Dumbass
Matt hancock
Gaming while on the phone with ur girl.
That post-ejaculate depression. It's basically when your brain starts to work again and realizes what the flock the penis just did.
Princess Diana's husband cheated on her.Beyonce's husband cheated on her.Jennifer Garner's husband cheated on her.Loni Anderson's husband cheated on her.Maria Shriver's husband cheated on her.Sandra Bullock's husband cheated on her.Vanessa Bryant's husband cheated on her.Eva Longoria's husband cheated on her.
Strip clubs, and paying for sex.
A dude I know has 4 kids with 4 different women and I think at least a DUI per kid
Jonah Falcon’s penis is so big that he claims he can’t achieve an erection without feeling lightheaded
Look at the female salespeople that get sent to your company for evidence
I had a friend who worked in the local college in my career field. She would come over and hang out, and we’d occasionally hook up. We had very casual sex and would occasionally talk about our day and whatnot. She asked me a question one time during coitus and my response was “uh, you can, yea, if you, shit I’m too horny†my brain honestly stopped working
I dont think of the weird ass things I'm thinking of to wank to
Sometimes, never stick your dick in crazy is easier said than done.
Ever try driving while getting a blowjob?
Adding on too many plates on the bench at the gym when you see a hot girl.
Not being able to remember your phone number when someone cute asks for it
I was trying on a new piece of clothing and my husband was walking by in the hall.I just hear him mutter "I almost walked into a damn wall".
When ever my girlfriend gets naked my brain becomes.... Dur Dur derp

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